Have you imagined that feeling when someone's offering you something, it's like you're a kind of stupid to reject it?
To give you a hint, that's what I feel today... I feel like turning down or reject an offer coz I am a sort of a shy person that for me it's gonna be a mortal sin if I actually don't pay for the rice that I am eating. You know, get that?
I have been worrying for the past few days on how will I celebrate my 18th birthday. Well, I'm supposed to be a debutante (if you'll imagine the "cotillion" thingy), I'm supposed to have 18 candles, 18 male friends and relatives to dance with me,18 rich friends to give me gifts and most of all,a stunning gown to look beautiful in that oh-so-romantic and oh-welcome-to-the-legal age day of my life-my birthday. But for me, I'd rather choose to stay simple and stay traditional like what I've been doing for the last 17 years. It is for the reason that (I sensed) that my parents could not and would not be able to give me my dream birthday. I'd rather not climb the highest peak of my dreams without plans for I might fall to the ground. My mum asked me if I wanted a "celebration ought for a debutante", but I declined. I just tell to myself that I'll give a bashful birthday party for me when I'll be able to reach my 100 years. Haha!
It's barely 1 week before my nightmare, I mean my birthday. But I'm still, you know, plan-less... (what I think of right now is to forget that it's my birthday and sleep all day!)
:)
